


You're here but I still Have to Stay High

by clasesolangelo



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-30
Updated: 2016-12-30
Packaged: 2018-09-13 09:00:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9116101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clasesolangelo/pseuds/clasesolangelo
Summary: Nico needs it to forget. He doesn't want Will to know or be angry with him, so he had to stop talking to Will because he would have figured it all out. Nico still needs to forget though, so he's torn between his best friend and his new fix.





	

It was wrong for him to want to get high, he knew it was, but he couldn’t help it. Weed was the only thing that was enough to fuck with his memory enough so that he only remembered tonight’s homework. He knew it was wrong and illegal but that didn’t stop him from taking a huge hit on the blunt he just rolled.  
When he was in his high Nico would tend to just stare out the window and breathe deeply. He didn’t smoke enough to get him giggling and partying, but he did enough to forget. Tonight was one of those nights where he would just stare out the window and look at the tree tops right by his window. He only looked over when a light came on, coming from his desk.  
He got off his window seat and grabbed his phone from his desk. Normally he didn’t look at his phone when he was high for fear something might come out and expose him, but he let it slide this once. The text was only from Will Solace anyway.  
_From: Will-_  
 _Hey, what are you up to? Seems like I haven’t spoken to you in a while. How is everything?_  
In all honesty Will and Nico hadn’t talked much since Nico had turned to other methods to control his moods about three months ago. Sure the two talked occasionally but not like they used to. The two of them were practically inseparable, always talking to each other in some way or another. They had been the closest of friends, and lately Nico had wanted to be more.  
Then Nico couldn’t take it anymore and got that first bag, rolled his first joint and took his first hit and then he was hooked on it. He knew, given Will’s dream profession of doctor he would never approve of Nico doing what he was doing so Nico dropped off the earth for a while. Last time he spoke to Will was a week or so ago, a very short and clipped conversation. It broke his heart to do it, but he didn’t want to hurt Will, and Will would never be interested if he knew about his habits.  
Nico blacked the screen out and put his phone back on the desk, face down. He wouldn’t talk to Will tonight, maybe he would respond in the morning. It was late enough that he could claim he fell asleep if he wanted to. Give Will yet another excuse for his terrible behavior.  
It took hours for him to be able to come back to earth long enough to take a shower, actually finish his homework and then set his alarm before he went to sleep that night.

The next morning he woke up with his usual headache and went on gathering his papers into his backpack and zipping it up for school. Food usually helped with his headaches so he grabbed a bagel on the way out the door. He lived around four blocks from his high school so he mostly walked there unless it was well below freezing then his dad would usually insist he take the bus to and from. This morning was crisp with mid-December air but it was nothing a black scarf didn’t cover up.  
When he got to his locker he unwound the scarf from his neck and hung it up on one of the hangers inside the locker. He started on the buttons of his black jacket next when someone poked his shoulder.  
“Well look who isn’t dead after all.” Nico turned to see the bright, sunny face of one Will Solace. Nico had always found Will attractive with his blonde hair and bright blue eyes. But today there was a sort of tiredness to him that Nico never saw in Will. “Fall asleep early last night did we?” Nico snapped out of it to answer the question.  
“Yeah, something like that.” Nico turned back to the buttons on his jacket and took it off one sleeve at a time.  
“So, how’ve you been? I haven’t talked to you in a while.” Will sounded hopeful. Nico glanced at him from the corner of his eye.  
“Been alright I guess. How about you?” Will sighed.  
“I’ve been okay, but I miss having my small Italian bean next to me at lunch.”  
“I’m not a bean.”  
“Nah, more like a pea. But bean sounds better than pea, so you’re my small Italian bean. Because let’s be honest, small Italian pea sounds like crap.” Will gave a small laugh. “Regardless you should swing by, come say hello and eat something. Because it looks like you haven’t been eating anything for the past three months.”  
“I have.” Nico mumbled as he shut the door to his locker.  
“Have you? You look smaller now than you did three months ago.” Nico looked into the face of the concerned boy.  
“I’m alright you know.” Will sighed.  
“If you’re alright then you won’t mind one of my surprise visits.” Nico’s eyebrow twitched. “I take it that’s a no.” Will sighed. “Come on Nico, what happened? What happened that you stopped talking to me? Why did you stop talking to me?”  
“I…” Nico didn’t have an answer to the direct question. He couldn’t think of a lie and he sure as hell wasn’t about to tell Will about the weed, so what was he supposed to do?  
“Can’t even tell me why you hate me now?” Nico’s head shot to Will.  
“I don’t hate you.” He said immediately. Will scoffed.  
“Sure, and tomorrow the sky will be green and the grass will be blue.”  
“Then prepare to walk on blue grass and look up at a green sky.” Nico muttered. “I don’t hate you Will.”  
“Really? Prove it and talk to me once in a while answer when I text you, communicate with me! I don’t care if you send me something written in Morse code.”  
“You don’t know the code.” Will huffed.  
“At least it shows effort, and that’s what I’m talking about is an effort to talk to me and not the bull shit you pull on me every day.”  
“I’m…sorry.” Was all Nico could muster out.  
“Sure, whatever Nico.” Will spat as he pushed past Nico and into his classroom. Nico sighed and rested his head against his locker for a minute before heading to his own class. As their schedules would have it, Will and Nico didn’t share any classes together, but they did have the same lunch period. Nico did not go over to Will’s table to say hello. It used to be their table before Nico apparently lost his mind.  
Nico walked through the rest of the day feeling guilty as hell for what he made Will feel. He knew he was doing it, making Will feel bad, but he was only doing it now to stave off something worse if he were ever to find out about Nico’s new habit. He walked through the hallway until he got to his locker and pulled his cold gear back out and put it back on to walk back home.  
On his way back he would puff air out and watch the clouds that came out of his mouth. He was always fascinated with doing it. He never really understood why, he just liked to breathe out and watch the little puff in front of his face.  
That stopped when he walked through his front door and climbed the stairs to his room, the old wood creaking under his feet slightly. The only sound in the dead house. Nico lived in a southern style inspired house, with a wrap-around porch and window seats in the small bedrooms, his included.  
Once he reached said bedroom he closed the door and started on his homework. He usually wouldn’t light up until late at night, when it was dark and no one was out and there was no light for anyone to see him. He did his homework to pass the time before he lit up.  
The first peak of darkness began to shine through his window, so he started preparing to roll up and hit it. He finished up the paragraph he was writing for a paper due in English and then closed his computer and began his process. When he was ready he grabbed the joint and a lighter and opened his window. His dad probably wouldn’t notice anyway, but still.  
He clicked the lighter and held it to the end of the joint and inhaled deeply. He was so into his mind that he didn’t hear footsteps on the other side of the door, and only barely registered the door opening and closing before the joint was ripped from his hands and hands were gripping at his shoulders as he looked into the face of Will Solace.  
“Nico what the hell do you think you’re doing!” Will yelled in his face. “What the hell Nico! What is this shit?” Nico sighed. “Is this why you haven’t spoken to me in three months?” Nico nodded. “The fuck! You chose a plant over me.” Will shook his head. “You better have a good explanation for this and a good reason I shouldn’t tell your dad.”  
“Well reason to not tell my dad is that he really won’t care as long as I don’t get caught.” Nico muttered.  
“Not funny Nico!”  
“Not trying Will. He doesn’t really care. As for the first…I don’t really have a good explanation for it.”  
“I think you do and you’re just too afraid to tell me what it is. Obviously you had to make the conscience decision to pick the stuff up and stop talking to everyone, which has everyone worried by the way. So, what’s the deal?” Will let go of Nico’s arms to sit across from him on the window seat like they used to, although the window seat wasn’t quite big enough for the two of them so their legs were almost on top of each other. “Why? Why did you pick this up instead of talking to me?” Nico sighed.  
“I…I wanted to forget and…I couldn’t forget anything until I started using, and it was helping, but then it seemed like I couldn’t go anywhere else so I increased the amount and I just…” The words came spilling out of Nico’s mouth before he could stop them. He didn’t even know what he was saying and it probably didn’t make any sense to anyone. Will put an arm around Nico’s shoulders and pulled him close. Will was warm and Nico loved that. He’d been so cold lately.  
“I’m sorry you felt like you couldn’t come to me. I’m sorry that you’re in this mess.” Will murmured into Nico’s black hair. “But it’s time for you to stop now and come back to me. It’s time for you to talk to me.” Nico dug his face into Will’s shoulder.  
“I miss them, mom and Bianca. And I know that I can talk to you about anything, but I didn’t want to talk, I wanted to forget. That sounds horrible but I did. I wanted to forget they existed, that anything or anyone but you existed. Then I found this stuff that made me forget and I liked the forgetting so I kept using.” Will nodded.  
“I understand Nico. I understand why you wanted to forget everyone and everything. But I don’t understand why you wouldn’t tell me about it, why you stopped talking to me.”  
“I knew you wouldn’t approve of what I was doing and I didn’t want you to be disappointed in me.”  
“A little backwards, don’t you think? That you don’t want me to be disappointed in you but you didn’t talk to me for three months. You’re right about one thing though, I don’t approve of this and I need you to stop.” Will softly nudged Nico’s head with his chin. “I can help you. Would you like me to help you?” Nico nodded into Will’s shoulder. “And then after you’re better we can talk about why it is that you only want to remember me, okay?” Nico looked into Will’s blue eyes and knew what Will was asking. He nodded.  
“Okay.” Will smiled and kissed his forehead.  
“Good. First thing, I need you to put the joint out and away.” Nico did as he was told and that began the shorter-than-expected road for Nico to get back the way he always wanted to be: happy.


End file.
